Monday, December 18, 2006

NY Times Asks Marriage Questions -- TPV Translates!

From the current #1 story on NY Times:

Questions Couples Should Ask (Or Wish They Had) Before Marrying

Relationship experts report that too many couples fail to ask each other critical questions before marrying. Here are a few key ones that couples should consider asking:

1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?

[I really think you are better with kids.]

2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?

[Let's talk prenup.]

3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

[Can we afford an illegal domestic worker?]

4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?

[What are those pills you take when you think I'm not looking?]

5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?

[Will you give me foot rubs?]

6) Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?

[Just how kinky are you? Can you be kinkier?]

7) Will there be a television in the bedroom?

[That might be kinky, if used properly.]

8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?

[Do I have to stop paying attention to Monday Night Football when you are yammering on the couch?]

9) Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?

[Wait, I thought we decided you will take care of the kids.]

10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?

[Remember when we had friends, before we had the kids?]

11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?

[Will you be able to put my parents in the home?]

12) What does my family do that annoys you?

[Please limit your answer to the first 500 complaints you can think of.]

13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?

[Apart from freedom, of course.]

14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?

[One day, or would we need at least a week?]

15) Do each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges we may face?

[Who will get the television when we split up?]


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